2016 NBA Playoff Preview: Western Conference

Hey look, it's part 2 of my NBA playoff preview. I feel I was a little harsh on those of you that don't like the NBA last time. Watching hockey isn't something I would wish on my worst enemy. I have something way better to keep you busy this time. Here is new Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau's first question time.

First a correction. There was a HUGE SHAKEUP in the Eastern Conference seeding since I published the preview the other day. Seeds 3-5 are now Heat, Hawks, and Celtics. Unfortunately that means the Russian interwebs won't get to broadcast a mind numbing Hawks/Hornets series as I promised. I hope Vladimir Putin won't kill me for this. In the big picture, this won't change anything since none of those teams was beating Toronto or Cleveland anyway.

Fuck. He's going to kill me.

The West

The NBA's Western Conference has been better than the East for a long time, and it still is, but holy hell is it top heavy now. You could easily cut the playoffs down to Top 4 this year and probably just the top 2. Golden State vs San Antonio...best of 25. Let's get this done Adam Silver.

1. Golden State Warriors - The Warriors set the single season mark for wins last night with 73, but no one saw it because that game was boring and Kobe was Kobeing like never before in his farewell game. Nevertheless, 73-9 is just insane and something we aren't likely to see again. The odd thing is, you can't even say they are the dominant favorite to win the Western Conference because of the team sitting there below them.

2. San Antonio Spurs - Only 6 teams EVER have won more games than the Spurs did this year, but unfortunately for them one of those teams happened to be this season. The casual fan still tends to think of the Spurs as old and boring, but they've been gradually reloading with guys like Kawhi Leonard and Lamarcus Aldridge stepping in to take the load off of old farts Tim Duncan, Manu Ginobili, and Tony Parker. Having the best coach in the game doesn't hurt either.

3. Oklahoma City Thunder - The Thunder's run is coming to an end. Kevin Durant is a free agent after this season and Russell Westbrook is a free agent after next season. Even if Durant kicks the can down the road and signs a short term deal, we all know they're both leaving. Then the Thunder turn into the Sacramento Kings and we never hear from them again. Thank god.

4. Los Angeles Clippers - Remember when Blake Griffin beat up the equipment guy? Good times. The Clippers are the most loathsome team in the league with a roster of players each more hateable than the last. Fortunately Doc Rivers continues to do things like playing his idiot son 21 minutes a game, so we'll never have to see them winning a championship.

5. Portland Trail Blazers - A friend of mine predicted Portland would be a Bottom 5 team this season. I just like pointing out how wrong he was. Given that the team now consists of Weber State's own Damian Lillard and "some guys" it really is kind of amazing they are the 5th seed though. Blazers/Clippers will probably be the best series in the first round in spite of the Clippers' unrelenting awfulness.

6. Dallas Mavericks - Every year I expect the Mavericks to start sucking and every year they limp into the playoffs. It's a shame since no one wants to watch them. 

7. Memphis Grizzlies - For the last month or so the Grizzlies have had trouble suiting up enough healthy players to actually play games. At least a quick sweep by the Spurs will put them out of their misery.

8. Houston Rockets - Nice job Sacramento. All you had to do was beat the Rockets to keep them out of the playoffs and you couldn't hold up your end of the bargain. Half your team didn't even make the trip. Now we have to watch the garbage ass Rockets for four more games at least.

The 2016 Western Conference Champion will be...the San Antonio Spurs. #HOTTAKE. It's just like the Spurs to spoil Golden State's party and they have the personnel to pull it off.

Hahaha, one day I'll be the Finals MVP and you'll be begging for change!